Thou shalt not read

7 Dec

I woke up this morning wishing for more time in bed.  I could always attribute the lethargy to allergy meds taken the night before, or the fact that my mum rang me at nearly midnight.  It’s probably got something to do with the time of year.  Winter weather is so conducive to cranking up the heater, turning on the TV and staying warm and snug under the covers.

The pace at work didn’t do much today as a pick-me-up.  I thought the stress at work would perk me up to no end.  I was wrong.  I haven’t got a lot on my to-do list today.

So on my lunch break I read Facebook and Twitter entries.  I read something that might have been attributed to me.  Now mind you, I can be slightly oversensitive and a tad paranoid.  I may also have a touch of megalomania.  After reading the statement, I told myself that it wasn’t all about me, that they could be talking about so many other people.  But then again, if I look at past history, my sensitivity to the comment may have credence.  Sometimes it does help to burn bridges.  There are things that should never be revisited ever again.  On hindsight, I probably shouldn’t have read that.  I don’t think they thought I would.  Serves me right for reading.  Serves me right for caring.  I should’ve told myself that there was nothing to see there and to move along.

It bothered me that the catty remark still had the power to hurt me.  It might not have been about me.  But that person still had the power to unsettle me.  And I asked myself why because it shouldn’t unsettle me.  I’ve moved hives and that particular queen bee has no power over me now.  This person mattered to me enough then.  But now, now, I’m going to let myself learn to outgrow that person 🙂


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